Terms of Service

Last updated: 30 August 2026

Welcome to OnlyFats.eu — the professional network for professional eaters. By joining the feast you agree to these terms. They're short, mostly painless, and contain zero diet talk.

1. Who can join

You must be at least 16 years old (or the minimum digital-consent age in your EU country) to create an account. One human, one account — no sock puppets at this dinner table.

2. Your account

Keep your password secret and your details accurate. You're responsible for activity on your account. Tell us at support@onlyfats.eu if you suspect someone's been nibbling where they shouldn't.

3. House rules

OnlyFats celebrates every body. To keep it that way, you agree not to:

• Post hateful, harassing, or body-shaming content.
• Share diet culture, weight numbers, or "guilty pleasure" guilt-tripping.
• Impersonate others or spread spam.
• Break the law or anyone's privacy.

Humor here pokes fun at corporate hustle culture — never at people. Break the rules and we may remove content or close your account.

4. Your content

You own what you post. By posting, you grant us a licence to display it on OnlyFats so the network can, you know, function. Delete it any time and that licence ends (save for backups that age out on our normal schedule).

5. A note on the parody

OnlyFats is a satire of professional-networking culture. We are not affiliated with, endorsed by, or otherwise associated with LinkedIn or any similarly named platform. Any resemblance to endless humble-brag posts is entirely intentional.

6. Liability

OnlyFats is provided "as is". We work hard to keep the kitchen open but can't guarantee uninterrupted service. To the extent permitted by law, we're not liable for indirect damages. Nothing here limits rights you have under mandatory EU consumer law.

7. Changes & contact

We may update these terms; we'll flag material changes. Your privacy choices are covered by our Privacy Policy. Questions? Email support@onlyfats.eu.